I'm finally past the worst of my current episode of depression, it doesn't mean that I still don't have bad days but at least they are fewer and farther apart and they don't last as long. Hope, it's what I hold on to and it's what keeps me going, knowing that I've done this many times before and that not only will I get through this but that I will come out the other end with a renewed sense of self and a stronger, better person all around. That is the gift that I've found with my depression, the diamond in the pit of coal, it may be hard and it may be painful but at least I can use it as a tool to help me be the person I want to be.
I feel a little like the apostle Paul when he talked about his infirmity that God wouldn't heal (2 Corinthians 12: 7-10) I have found that through this "infirmity" comes several blessings, it pushes me to allow others to help me, it forces me to slow down and re-prioritize, it helps me to be more patient and understanding of others as well as helping me become a better stronger individual, and best of all, at least I hope, it helps me to help others because of my empathy and understanding.
I'm not where I want to be yet and I still have a long road ahead of me but at least I can see the light at the end of the tunnel again.
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